And I said to a man who stood at the gate of the year; “Give
me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.” And he replied: “Go out
into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God. That shall be to you better
than a light and safer than a known way.”  ~M. L. Haskins

Fear creates an illusion of separateness.  Worries flare in shards of anxiety.

First instinct is to run from life’s quandary but instead I freeze. I heard your voice and turned 

 Just in time to glimpse pearls streaming from heaven.

Reflecting the truth of what we are. For beneath our human
frailties and half truths

 Lives a deeper truth

  A radiance from which we are born.

By saying uncomfortable feelings out
loud, it somehow magnifies their significance and increases my vulnerability. I’d
rather share with you serene surface thoughts but I owe you so much more. Given
a little space I notice my emotions play out and perspective returns. (I am
grateful when perspective returns balance). Suddenly, what seemed monumental now seems
almost silly, if it were not so painful. Perhaps, an emotion “playing out”
is an apt term. I am hopeful that the more I notice the pattern; the intensity of
my emotions will lessen and lose power over time.

However, I am getting sidetracked
from what I really want to say. Our circumstances in life are not significant; we
can be on top of the world one moment and tragedy might strike the next. What
matters most, is how we respond. Although, I may
have heard these words a thousand times over, they hold a new meaning for me. Tara Brach offers wise counsel by encouraging us to be present to what arises in a life
affirming way. Not to deny pain, anger, anxiety, sorrow or any uncomfortable
emotions but to allow ourselves to feel and acknowledge them and to offer loving kindness and acceptance. 

Often we may avoid painful emotions by numbing out with various distractions, be it food, alcohol, T.V. etc. Yet, I can't help wonder, if we avoid feeling our difficult emotions do we miss out on feeling the good ones such as joy and happiness, too?

As I stand at the gate of this year
I have ample time to reflect. It is clear to me that each of YOU are pearls
streaming from heaven and that we are inexplicably strewn together by Love. I
will place my hand into God’s loving trust as I cross the threshold into this New
Year. I can relax into the new and leave old worries and cares behind because it
is not what happens that is of relevance.  I can only take with me the gratitude in my
heart for your radiance in my life.

Note: I dedicate this post to my sister Patricia Maio who has offered me a lifetime of love and is a radiant pearl in my life. Happy Birthday, Pat!

~liz Sorensen Wessel

Mandala, Dec. 2012 by ~liz