Days 160-164 Finding Yourself?

"You can't find yourself in time," Eckhardt Tolle says. "You can only find yourself in the moment."

But, if your goal is to "find" yourself, where did you go? Did your "self" somehow get lost in the forest of life? Where do you start looking for it?

Watch images of yourself as a small child and ask if you know that person. Can you remember feeling your truest self when you were small and gradually sensing that self retreating further into the trees as your life-walk continued?

I was a wildly enthusiastic child (photo – from a childhood birthday) – so ebullient that my father said to me one day when I was about eight, "Chip, I hope you never lose that enthusiasm." "Lose" my enthusiasm? How could I lose something like that, I wondered.

He understood the risk. By definition, adulthood frowns on colleagues who behave "childishly." Sensing this, your child self probably went into hiding. Now, you sit around meeting tables wearing the solemn mask someone else made for you.

There's nothing wrong, of course, with maturity. The problem comes when you crush the truth, freshness and awe with which your child eyes saw the world.

These are the sacred eyes that once saw with the earnest clarity that is life's finest gift. When you behold that light with the seasoned vision of your adulthood you see Love's energy.

True maturity keeps counsel with both the adult and child self. Ignore either one and you will feel the loss-of-self anxiety that plagues our shared journey on this earth.

-Erie Chapman

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Categories: Reflections, Holidays, Spirituality

7 responses to “Days 160-164 Finding Yourself?”

Bobbye

June 10, 2013 at 10:17 am

Erie,
Sometime I feel like you and I are riding on the same beam of light. Many of these thoughts have crossed my mind, and have, I’m sure, been on other’s as well. In my book, The Light Within, I have a poem that says:
Imagine what life could be like tomorrow,
If you could reach back in time and could borrow,
The innocence, delight you had as a kid,
The playful intent of the things that you did.
What it goes on to say is that we need to learn how to enjoy the moment. I think all of us have a tendency to take life too seriously from time to time. What I am trying hard to remember is that I, and all of us if we’re smart, have to play as well.
Another great reflection.
Thank you,
Bobbye

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Cheri Cancelliere

June 10, 2013 at 11:47 am

Thank you, Erie, for this precious and relevant message. The older that I get, the more that I see the need to “become like a little child.” We must grow and learn, of course, but never lose our childlike sense of wonder. I remember talking with my grandmother on her 94th birthday. She remarked that when she woke up that morning, she felt a bit of a shock. “How did I get so old” she asked? “It seems like only yesterday I was starting my first day of school.” She went on to describe her classroom and teacher in great detail, and laughed so hard recalling her new red shoes that she insisted on wearing even though they hurt her feet. I promised to buy her another pair of red shoes even though she could no longer see or walk, for we are never too old to delight in little treasures. She was a marvelous example of living in the moment and holding on to a childlike faith in all that is good and beautiful. I miss her.

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~liz Wessel

June 10, 2013 at 11:25 pm

Your expression paints such great analogies and images in a deeply meaningful but concise manner. I feel fortunate to have experienced your marvelous exuberance in person some years back, Erie. There is a natural cadence flowing through the inclusiveness of your thoughts. I love this one.

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~liz Wessel

June 11, 2013 at 9:08 am

A few thoughts from Richard Rohr…
“Jesus calls us to become like little children, or as the Zen master puts it, to have a “beginner’s mind.” Jesus says the only people who can recognize and be ready for what he’s talking about are the ones who come with the mind and heart of a child. The older we get, the more we’ve been betrayed and hurt and disappointed, the more barriers we put up to beginner’s mind. We must always be ready to see anew. But it’s so hard to go back, to be vulnerable, to continue to say to your soul, ‘I don’t know anything.’ (A man told me recently that was the mantra that has kept him a happy man.)”

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Erie Chapman Foundation

June 11, 2013 at 9:53 am

Thank you Bobbye, Cheri and Liz. Each of you writes with more eloquence than do I and I appreciate the way your participation will help caregivers.

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Deacon Dan

June 14, 2013 at 8:45 am

Perhaps this is what we have lost as adults, the aliveness of children: “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go out and do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Howard Thurman

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Erie Chapman Foundation

June 14, 2013 at 8:50 am

This is a terrific reference, Deacon Dan. What we need, indeed, is people who have “come alive.” I wonder what this says about so many whose life energy has been dimmed by the drumbeat of conformity.

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