"A helmsman comes, throws a silken rope/ and binds us tightly to each other…" – Czeslaw Milosz

   She drinks quietly from the raindrop on her face. The daisy is beautiful by herself. What happens when her sister arrives?

   Meaning comes in relationship. It is only when you pair with another that the possibility for sacred intimacy arises. One-to-one is where untold chances for love's expression emerge.

   The complexity of our hearts makes it difficult for it to be any other way. To embrace mind, spirit and body with another being in a sacred way means the weaving of a trillion threads. Thus, the intercourse of three or more is usually reduced to a shallower exchange.

   The holy encounter becomes caregiver to patient. Marriage comes among couples (a definition now broadened by our Supreme Court.) There is also, of course, person to pet, mother to daughter, father to son, friend to friend ("threes are hard") & even friend to enemy in a pairing often explored in literature.

   This is not to diminish the energy that can propel some teams to spectacular accomplishment. But, among three or more, intimacy can be dodged. Between two, truth is harder to hide. 

  Consider artist to painting, gardener to garden, leader to caregiver, caregiver to caregiver? What about savior to victim?

   Ultimately, it begins with your relationship to yourself. 

   Pairing matters most when courage marries vulnerability, when intimacy meets truth & when effort & intelligence yield eloquent expression. In Robert Frost's words:

Only where love and need are one,
And the work is play for mortal stakes,
Is the deed ever really done
For Heaven and the future's sakes.

   It is fine to tell someone you love them. It is better to show them. It is best when telling becomes an art & when showing becomes a sacrifice as well as a sacrament. When a couple can live love, not fear. 

-Erie Chapman. 

   Photographs by Erie