Journal of Sacred Work

Days 118-122 – What Kübler-Ross Missed

 
Marcy with chip in background  Have these pandemic fissures left us feeling like something or someone is dying?

   Suddenly, we have been arrested & imprisoned. People who love their work cannot do it. Children who want to say goodbye to dying parents end up waving through nursing home windows. Loved ones touch hands on cellphone screens. 

   Dr. Elizasbeth Kübler-Ross' five stages of dying become strikingly relevant. What were the range of reactions people had when news of the pandemic spread? Denial, anger, bargaining, depression & acceptance.

   There is a sixth stage, the biggest of all, pointed out by a physician friend. It is meaning. 

   Since meaning is hope & hope fuels or our lives the subtraction of that feels like a murder. We are supposed to find new life through during traumatic events. The fact that it is so agonizingly hard to do so is what infuses tragedy with opportunity.

   Holocaust survivor Victor Frankl said meaning flows from the work we offer during crises, the love we give & our ability to show courage in the face of suffering. 

   Millions are revaluing the rich meaning of a once matter-of-fact human encounter: a loving hug. When that practice returns so will hope. 

-Erie Chapman   

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2 responses to “Days 118-122 – What Kübler-Ross Missed”

  1. Liz Avatar
    Liz

    I have experienced a sense of grief with a more recent realization that this pandemic is not just passing through but is here for longer than imagined…and this fragility, this awareness that speaks to how fleeting life really is, and, yes meaning…
    A friend who is a priest, wrote to me via email this w/e:
    “I read your posting, as well as Erie’s. I think it’s good that you are posting because it is a message of hope, which we need so much. The virus has tumbled all our enterprises, It is very difficult, especially for those with little money, and around the world for those who cannot maintain social distance, and don’t even have the water supply to wash their hands frequently.
    I have been thinking about the impact of the Covid-19 on us – beyond physical illness. The congregants of parishes are meeting through technology and not in person. While they are safer from illness, they are sacrificing that very human connection that is at the heart of the Eucharist. Jesus gave the Eucharist with the words, “This is my Body…This is the cup of my blood…” In doing so he gave of himself in a physical way. We are now reduced to connecting with a screen that has a picture of each other. We mediate the “I-Thou” relationship through an “I-It” technology. And we don’t think about the impact, although we feel it in the emotional toll it takes on us I feel tired more often these days, and I think it is because of the isolation and the effort it takes to connect though technology – the emotional effort.”
    His closing salutation offered encouragement to us…”keep writing”
    Thank you for offering ongoing hope and most especially meaning, Erie

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  2. Terry Chapman Avatar
    Terry Chapman

    he search for meaning is the lodestar of our existence; nothing is more important in feeling your life has been well lived! I can not imagine deciding on whether to drink water to stay alive or to wash oneself. So many have so little and we who have so much should be forever grateful with each cool clean glass of water we drink; each well made safe meal; and each comfortable night’s sleep, sheltered safely away from most threats.
    For me, my life’s meaning is still being set in place as I am able to pursue using my God given abilities to live fully every day and to help others without regard to their “value to society”. Easy to mouth and extremely hard to achieve but in trying, perhaps our true life’s meaning will become apparent to God!

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