Reaching out

Good morning, friends near and far,

As we navigate through the unrelenting challenges of this global pandemic and the impact on individuals, families, communities and countries. there is greater awareness of our interdependence and the need to help each other to move through this.  

In healthcare, I am keenly aware of the devastating impact this pandemic is having on caregivers who have been called to work in a healing profession. In every life there is loss and grief but currently, there is such a prolonged, seemingly unending wave, upon wave of intense suffering. Caregivers are immersed in, bear witness to, and accompany those who suffer to offer comfort, to hold a dying patient's hand as they take their last breath, again and again. 

 

How can we help healers, heal?  Beyond compassion fatigue and burnout is the moral distress and injury caregivers are experiencing.

Where do we find hope? How can we help each other through these painful times?

In the following video, Lucy Hone shares her journey as an active participant in the grief process. Research shows that you can rise up from adversity and act in certain ways that can help you navigate tough times, practical ways that are simple, yet profound. Be inspired, spend a few minutes of your time, for this is truly worth a listen!

When on reflect upon the three strategies offered, I am struck by their alignment with the wisdom of Buddhist teachings.

  1. Suffering is a part of life- it does not discriminate
  2. Choose carefully where you select your attention- make it a habit of realistically appraising situations and focus on the things that you can change and somehow accept the things that you can't. (Serenity Prayer) Tune into the good, you've got so much to live for, choose life not death.
  3. Is what I'm doing, the way I am thinking, the way I am acting, helping or harming me?

Hone's concluding remarks, “if you ever find yourself in a situation where you think there's no way I'm coming back from this, I urge you to lean into these strategies and think again. I won't pretend, this way is easy, and it doesn't remove all the pain. I’ve learned that thinking this way really does help and more than anything it is shown me that it is possible to live and grieve at the same time, and for that I am grateful."

May we accompany one another on our life journey reacognizing grief is an integral part of life as we find strength in our companionship.  My friend and colleague, Reosanne Ponzetti, shared a cup of kindness with me, offering these beautiful thoughts.

"It takes courage to love a human being, courage to risk loving a person made of stardust, rain, and air, courage to recognize our human finitude and trust nonetheless in the infinity of love.

Grief is love.  The physical pain, anguish, yearning rage:  All of this is love. 

If we are among the fortunate—the ones who love and live long enough—each of us will take a turn at this particular mode of love.  Because it is love, grief can be trusted."

 I hope these strategies can be shared with those in need of a cup of loving kindness and support. 

Thank you for your friendship, love and companionship along this journey. 

Offered by Liz Sorensen Wessel
Artwork by ~liz

 

 

5 responses to “Days 36-37 Grief is Love”

  1. Maureen McDermott Avatar
    Maureen McDermott

    Wow, Liz; how powerful is Lucy, sharing from her experience with so much conviction, hope and love. Her strategies, simple and profound. May we be ready with open hearts to be compassionate to one another. May all those involved in the health profession be supported during this time of daily challenges.

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  2. Liz Wessel Avatar
    Liz Wessel

    Thank you, Maureen, thank you for your blessings on caregivers who truly need all of our support!!!

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  3. Jolyon Avatar
    Jolyon

    I agree wholeheartedly with what is written and what was presented in the TED talk. Life and death are always with us. We are always better if we understand that Love has a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear, a time for you. When you seek the balance of Love the kindness will buoy one’s self to the surface again. The Vedas, the Upanishads. The Gnostic writings of old still resonate with us as they tell the truth about the world. Life is. Death is. Choose kindness in life. Choose to take that breath and smile. That smile may be the reflection someone needs today.
    Om

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  4. Liz Wessel Avatar
    Liz Wessel

    So beautifully expressed, Jolyon and your comments are a reflection of your kind and thoughtful spirit!

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  5. Erie Chapman Foundation Avatar

    “Grief is love.” What a life-changing title, Liz. Jolyon and Maureen’s additions, “Choose kindness…” and “be ready with open hearts…” are such lovely additions.
    Best of all are your comments and your fanciful, brilliant, painting of spirits dancing in the heavens.
    Your friend, Roseanne, is incredibly eloquent! “Grief is love. The physical pain, anguish, yearning rage: All of this is love….—each of us will take a turn at this particular mode of love. Because it is love, grief can be trusted.”
    So profound, welcome and appreciated. Thank you for your thoughts, your art, and your willingness to be a vehicle for others!

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